Few people realize or know that before my career in motherhood I had a very brief career as a Registered Nurse. School wasn’t my favorite, but I knew it was a means to the end. The end being a career that would achieve financial independence. So in high school, when choosing a future vocation and […]

The days are busy and the to do list never seems to get smaller. My laundry is piled high and my grief is still heavy. Next week will mark three years since I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. That day is also known as Jane’s birthday. It’s looming on the calendar and I […]

Tis the season for late summer rain. The kind of intense rain that pops up out of nowhere in the midst of full sunlight. It is both beautiful and can instantly ruin any outdoor event. One of the best parts of summer showers are the almost guaranteed rainbows that accompany them. Lately, I’ve noticed several […]

Exactly six months ago I was sitting in the kitchen when Robert came inside to inform me that he thought Jane had broken her leg. She wasn’t crying, but she looked mad and inconvenienced. The next day we took her to Robert’s clinic where an Xray confirmed that she had, in fact, fractured her leg […]

Many years ago, before having children, I picked up a new hobby in the form of sewing. It was slow going at first and I still don’t claim any expertise. With the arrival of children, my sewing has focused predominantly on bibs, burb cloths and children’s clothes. I don’t sew as much as I once […]

Two years ago, on my 30th birthday, I told Robert that I wanted to write a book before I turned 40. He smiled, skeptical and encouragingly, and asked what kind of book I planned to write. I didn’t have a solid answer. I thought a cookbook would be fun, maybe even a Bible study or […]

I have been convicted of many things since the loss of my daughter. My priorities, namely, became a glaring problem. My own comfort, happiness and selfishness are too high on the list of importance. I have been silent on many things in my life because it was uncomfortable, because I didn’t want to hurt feelings […]

It’s been a hard few days. Grief ebbs and flows, life itself shifts and moves in unpredictable ways. Sometimes I can pinpoint exactly what has made a day difficult and why we have experienced more grief. Like yesterday when Robert text me and said, “I just saw a patient that I hadn’t seen since February […]

A couple of days ago I opened my calendar to write down some upcoming appointments. I haven’t used or even looked at my calendar in months, there has been nothing coming up and nothing to remember. Robert asked how many weeks pregnant I was and I replied that I thought I was 32 weeks or […]

When an event in your life strips you bare, there is no good intention or false ideology to hide behind. Enneagram 1 here. I have a great desire to “do the right thing”. I want others to also “do the right thing.” This isn’t bad in and of itself, but my tendency to be critical […]